Hurray, Friends! The sun is shining in Portland! I celebrated the good weather and start of the weekend with a lunchtime run. I hesitate to say it was a great run. Maybe it was just a good run. And maybe it was a good run because it didn’t completely suck. And for that I am grateful.
It’s been one of those dreadful training weeks. Running was difficult. Slow. Agonizing. Easy runs didn’t feel easy. Satisfyingly hard runs transformed into mediocre runs. My usual sources of inspiration weren’t working. I felt physically and mentally exhausted. So last night instead of gritting my teeth against another disappointing 10 miles I decided to give myself the night off.
Instead I picked up a bottle of red wine, a romantic comedy, and some apples. At home I uncorked the bottle, baked up the apples with cinnamon, raisins and honey, and fixed myself up on the couch for some serious lounging. It would be a girls night… for one! There would be no running, no guilt and no worry, I said to myself. My only job of the night was to vegetate to the best of my ability.
This morning I fought the urge to get out early and run before work. I carried on lounging and enjoying the Friday morning. This afternoon, however I took a spin during lunch. And you know what? It wasn’t horrible. It wasn’t amazingly, heartstoppingly powerful, but it was stronger than any of my workouts this week and I felt happy to be zipping by the waterfront. It was…. satisfying. Deeply so. I was soooo relieved. It felt like Running and I had been fighting all week – bickering like a couple and stubbornly refusing to give in to the other. Today it felt like we found each other again – and while I didn’t get a heady runner’s high or feeling of lightness that comes during really great runs, it felt GOOD. And sometimes feeling good is enough.