I REALLY dislike you. All of you.
If treadmills weren’t so useful I’d write a letter to the treadmill inventor and ask that he or she re-consider. Do treadmills really make the world a better place? Can’t we do without them?
The problem comes back to me though. If only I were better at personal time management and early morning perkiness I would never ever have to go near a treadmill. As a result I wouldn’t cultivate such an unhappy relationship with an inanimate object that is, at its base, not designed to be a torture device and is supposed to make me a more healthful being. But it just doesn’t feel like that does it?
This entire week I’ve dutifully set three alarm clocks to get up and run before work. And each time I’ve failed. Each morning I’ve snoozed so many times that the alarm clock gives up and suddenly I realize that not only have I missed my run but now I have to make the decision between taking a shower and brushing my hair. (Hair, I’m sorry but stinky armpits take priority.)
With the multiple alarm clocks ignored, I’ve been forced to push my work out to the evening when my motivation takes a nosedive. I just KNOW that if I set foot inside my apartment, marathon dreams be damned, I’m going for rice crackers, hummus and comfy pants. The trick is to circumnavigate my inherent laziness bring my running clothes to work and hit the gym on the way home. It’s a good plan, but it means that I’ve choosen the treadmill over the open roads. It’s a difficult choice and one I rue immediately.
Last night I fought through 5 1/2 miles of treadmill – doing battle with tight hamstrings, sore legs and near toxic levels of boredom . The headphone jack on the mill wasn’t working and so I couldn’t listen to the Olympic coverage. Even worse, the machine had a new fangled monitor to hook up an i-Phone and watch movies. But since the monitor wasn’t on, it acted like a mirror. I was forced to stare at the dim reflection of my sweaty face, mile after mile. It was pure dreadmill dreadfullness. I completed the 5 1/2 miles in before calling it quits. It was a good, productive run and if the dreadmill hadn’t been there maybe I wouldn’t have run at all. I admit that dreadmills are dreadful but they do have a place in this world. And they do serve as a great motivator for waking up early.